I’m trying more and more ways to motivate myself to write on personal development. This article excluding this paragraph is sinfully long; it’s around 1000 words. However, it mostly deals with sex so you may enjoy it.
My posts deals with a guy’s point of view so, I’m writing in this article based on the male’s perception. It’s kind of funny that I’m writing this post since I’m in America and most people can’t control their lust in this country. Lust is something that makes people frustrated and they don’t think straight half the time. Over in America it’s common for people to sleep with three to four people before getting married, which is kind of absurd according to me, since I’m from the East. For American teens it’s common to loose their virginity before going to college. For boys, they try to get “laid” on prom night on their senior year or earlier in high school. Also, a lot of guys in America carry a condom in their wallet, just in “case” they need to use it to satisfy them selves.
Anyways, moving on with this topic, we can’t always express ourselves sexually to gratify ourselves. We live in a civilized society where we can’t just have sex with random people. Over the years, due to my religious faith, I had to find ways to control my urges. So far I believe I successfully accomplished them. To control your sexual desires is to control your self from falling apart. If you have sex with random people you may get sexual transmitted diseases which can make you ill or on a serious matter it can kill you.
Work Out
Your body has a lot of potential energy. When you work out you’re usually too tired to even think about sex or even go looking at girls which can trigger your lustful ways. Instead of letting your energy get stored away for sex, you can use it to workout and get stronger and stay fit. By working out, you’re getting your mind off of sex and concentrating on the development of your body’s strength and endurance. If you exercise often you won’t have thoughts that promotes triggering your sexual drive.
Be Active
On days when you don’t work out, don’t just sit there, do something. Look around to find something to do such as play games with your family, or go out with friends and watch a movie. Or go outside and take a walk in your neighborhood or in a nearby park to relax your mind. Or be like me, write articles to help others, or get on FaceBook, or whichever social network you’re on.
Have People Around You
Do your best NOT to stay alone. If you stay alone sexual thoughts may creep in and it may trigger your sexual desires. You may start looking at girls’ “assets” as they pass by you in the streets or you may start looking at porn, which is not good. Always try your best to have a friend with you and hangout. Do something that requires a lot of energy such as playing bowling or bicycling. I always keep myself busy by hanging out or being on the phone with someone, that way at least somebody is talking to me and I’m not alone.
No Pornography
When I was in high school I was tempted to look at porn many times by these Mexican kids. These Mexicans would bring in porn magazines from their older brothers or somebody and look at them during lunch. They would push me to look at them, but due to me religious faith I always turn away, even though in the back of my head I was always tempted to see the wonders behind a girl’s shirt. Porno content should always be avoided; pornography promotes people’s sexual drives unnecessarily. Porno has corrupted society in which it promotes unethical sexual actions. Nowadays there is no shame in revealing private parts of one’s body. The internet is full of porn; according to blogging-ads, “sex related sites on the net make up a vast majority of online content”. Don’t get caught into this.
Don’t Jerk It
Regardless of how strong your sexual drive is, do not masturbate. If you masturbate to release your frustrations then you’re going to be caught in a constant cycle. And in this cycle you’re not deviating away from controlling your lust, you’re actually promoting your lustful ways. So, you may wonder how to get rid of the frustration. In my opinion just leave it; on some nights you may have wet dreams, and that’s how you should release your frustration. The reason I advise against masturbation is because it can lead to an addiction of doing it. The side effects of excessive masturbation includes:
- Fatigue, you’ll be tired most of the time
- Lower Back Pain
- Stress; you’ll be stressed out for the most little things.
- Thinning of the hair, leading to hair loss
- Soft and weak ejaculation
- Premature ejaculation
- Groin /Testicular pain
- Pain or cramp in the pelvic cavity
By masturbating you’re not only harming your body but your also harming any daily productive work you may be doing. Such work may be your job, you may be too tired to think and concentrate on your work, and this may affect you negatively in your career advancements.
Conclusion
If you really want to control your sexual desires, I suggest you to get married if you have the financial means. If you don’t have the financial means in getting married then I suggest you practice restraint until you do. There is no reason to sleep around to “try” different girls’ flowers. If you do, you will not have a stable life and on top of that you increase your chances of getting sexual transmitted deceases. A happy marriage life is a healthy life, in which you get to have sexual satisfaction and you’ll be happy with it. I will not get into the topic of marriage; it will be on another post. But my best advice is to refrain from having anything that leads you to loose control of your sexual drive.
If you have questions, feel free to ask me.
This is why I like you very much, brother. You have the real religious faith in you. Otherwise it is too hard to stay away from getting “laid” even while living in the United States.
Anyway, your post was really nice and advisable. I liked it
But the people who love to have sex regularly, won’t like it at all.
Thanks Aminul, I know of the risks and my religious faith is what’s keeping me in restraint. People who have sex regularly cannot live without it.
That’s why it’s advisable to get married first, if the person is financially and mentally ready, because then there is no problem doing it.
LOL. Hey, masturbation isn’t bad. I think u got the list from this ayurvedic site, who promotes “non” sexual lifestyle. Hairloss & vision are famous scare tactics that are used.
There are lots of benefits of masturbation. In reality, benefits actually outrun any negative influence it has
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Masturbation#Health_and_psychological_effects
From a religious perspective, masturbation isn’t good but from a health perspective, it’s actually advisable. Honestly, I would rather have people masturbating than having sex.
great article!
i came on this site and there is a lot of great content! keep up the great work! i learned a lot from this. thanks a lot azmi!
@Arnab: lolz, dude it affects your mind if done excessively. Not many can stop so, it’s better to avoid it.
@concerned man: thanks
This post is utterly absurd. Sexual feelings are not sinful and immoral. Under whose jurisdiction was it bequeathed to be uncivilized to embrace our physical needs? It certainly cannot be God since we were molded in his image and if we feel these pangs then he must feel them too thereby making them good. We are only human and it is a perfectly natural. Why is it only acceptable to have sex before marriage? Does a signature on a legal document make sex more meaningful? Why should we stifle our natural urges?
If we bow to our natural urges, would you know who your father is? Isn’t it moral for a guy to sleep with one woman than 10 women and vice versa with a woman?
I find this quite absurd. First and foremost, I don’t see the problem with exposing the human body. And you don’t really clarify.
In the Garden of Eden, who wore clothes?
What about art?
Is there something wrong with the human body?
Second, I would agree with you about physical exercise, except that there is a line. To much and your body starts to produce more testosterone, which increases sex drive. Be more specific.
And finnally, don’t badmouth America, please.
“It’s kind of funny that I’m writing this post since I’m in America and most people can’t control their lust in this country.”
Even if that painfully stupid comment were true, then what the hell are you doing here? If its soooo terrible, go live on a deserted island, or become a eunich, and don’t pass on your idiocy to further AMERICAN generations.
“I don’t see the problem with exposing the human body” if everyone did that I’m sure our society would have problems. Where would our society stand when it comes to being civilized?
“In the Garden of Eden, who wore clothes?” that was before they were kicked out of the garden and shame came about.
“What about art?” Art and reality are two different components.
“Is there something wrong with the human body?” No, there’s nothing wrong but one should practice modesty.
And I didn’t say to over did the exercise thing. It’s common sense to balance it.
“don’t badmouth America” I never did, I stuck with the truth. Why would I ever badmouth the country that gave me opportunities?
“Even if that painfully stupid comment were true, then what the hell are you doing here?” The same thing what all non-Americans are doing here…education. Should I asked what is America doing in Iraq, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Afghanistan? Should I say the same for American forces who are exploiting resources from Asian countries?
You titles yourself as “An innocent bystander” and yet you say the things you said…I’m guessing you’re not a strong Christian.
I have been practising what you have told since last 5 years and Life is Beautiful.
Not only there should be control on sex.There are other things in life which should be controlled.
In short , i love being IN CONTROL.